Thursday, September 30, 2004

Surrogate Pillows?

(For the "Breakup Babe", if ever she happens to venture into these blog parts again)

A new consumer’s product is sweeping the Japanese marketplace by storm. Linen maker Kameo Corp., has now made available the new ‘Boyfriend’s Arm Pillow’; which consists of a headless torso and a stuffed arm that can curl around the sleeper.

That’s the creepiest thing I have EVER heard! Who wants to wake up to a headless torso of any kind? That just has to cause some future repressed memories and sweaty nightmares.

This special pillow offers single, borderline-desperate women the means to be able to curl up comfortably with something that won’t thrash, squirm, or try to slip the sausage up her ass in the middle of the night.

They are even set to release other newer models of the ‘Boyfriend’s Arm Pillow’. Muscular ones for sleepers who prefer to sleep with beefy Yokozuna types, or slender ones for those who dig the wimpy Woody Allen type instead. Isn’t that nice? I wonder if in the future they will create an arm pillow with track marks and tatoos for women those who are more accused to waking up in a strange place with passed out junkies?

What an odd compensation in lieu of lacking a real boyfriend. Man, if they start making these things so that they come with a built in vibrator and are able to take out the trash each night before bed; we men will be up Shit Creek without a pussy paddle, fella’s!

I can’t wait until they unveil the much anticipated men’s version of this pillow. It’ll probably just be a headless set of breasts that we can flop face down into and pass out.


Post a Comment

<< Home